还有一些其他的理由,使得我们更难获得平静。这有些矛盾,因为拥有自己的事业,是一件不错的事,但同时,人们也从未对自己的短暂一生有过这么高的期待。
阿兰·德波顿
英国作家

阿兰·德波顿(Alain de Botton),英国作家,1969年出生于瑞士苏黎世,毕业于英国剑桥大学。著有小说《爱情笔记》、《爱上浪漫》、《亲吻与诉说》及散文作品《拥抱逝水年华》、《哲学的慰藉》、《旅行的艺术》、《身份的焦虑》等。

我经常对事业感到恐慌,周日下午,晚霞洒满天空,我的理想和现实的差距却是这样残酷,令我沮丧的只想抱头痛哭。

For me they normally happen, these career crises, often, actually, on a Sunday evening, just as the sun is starting to set, and the gap between my hopes for myself and the reality of my life starts to diverge so painfully that I normally end up weeping into a pillow.

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我提出这件事是因为,我认为不只有我这么感觉。你可能不这么认为,但我感觉我们活在一个充满事业恐慌的时代,就在我们认为我们已经理解我们的人生和事业时,真实便来恐吓我们。

I'm mentioning all this -- I'm mentioning all this because I think this is not merely a personal problem; you may think I'm wrong in this, but I think we live in an age when our lives are regularly punctuated by career crises, by moments when what we thought we knew -- about our lives, about our careers -- comes into contact with a threatening sort of reality.

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现在或许比以前更容易过上好生活,但却比以前更难保持冷静,或不为事业感到焦虑。今天我想要检视,我们对事业感到焦虑的一些原因,为何我们会变成事业焦虑的囚徒。不时抱头痛哭,折磨人的因素之一是,我们身边的那些势利鬼。

It's perhaps easier now than ever before to make a good living. It's perhaps harder than ever before to stay calm, to be free of career anxiety. I want to look now, if I may, at some of the reasons why we might be feeling anxiety about our careers. Why we might be victims of these career crises, as we're weeping softly into our pillows. One of the reasons why we might be suffering is that we are surrounded by snobs.

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对那些来访牛津大学的外国友人,我有一个坏消息,这里的人都很势利。有时候,英国以外的人会想象,势利是英国人特有的个性,来自那些乡间别墅和头衔爵位。坏消息是,并不只是这样,势利是一个全球性的问题,我们是个全球性的组织,这是个全球性的问题,它确实存在。势利是什么?,势利是以一小部分的你,来判别你的全部价值,那就是势利。

In a way, I've got some bad news, particularly to anybody who's come to Oxford from abroad. There's a real problem with snobbery, because sometimes people from outside the U.K. imagine that snobbery is a distinctively U.K. phenomenon, fixated on country houses and titles. The bad news is that's not true. Snobbery is a global phenomenon; we area global organization, this is a global phenomenon. What is a snob? A snob is anybody who takes a small part of you, and uses that to come to a complete vision of who you are. That is snobbery.

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今日最主要的势利,就是对职业的势利。你在派对中不用一分钟就能体会到,当你被问到这个21世纪初,最有代表性的问题:你是做什么的?你的答案将会决定对方接下来的反应,对方可能对你在场感到荣幸,或是开始看表,然后想个借口离开。

The dominant kind of snobbery that exists nowadays is job snobbery. You encounter it within minutes at a party, when you get asked that famous iconic question of the early 21st century, "What do you do?" According to how you answer that question, people are either incredibly delighted to see you, or look at their watch and make their excuses.

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势利鬼的另一个极端,是你的母亲。

Now, the opposite of a snob is your mother.

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不一定是你我的母亲,而是一个理想母亲的想象,一个永远义无反顾的爱你,不在乎你是否功成名就的人,不幸地,大部分世人都不怀有这种母爱,大部分世人决定要花费多少时间,给于多少爱,不一定是浪漫的那种爱,虽然那也包括在内,世人所愿意给我们的关爱、尊重,取决于我们的社会地位。

Not necessarily your mother, or indeed mine, but, as it were, the ideal mother, somebody who doesn't care about your achievements. Unfortunately, most people are not our mothers. Most people make a strict correlation between how much time, and if you like, love -- not romantic love, though that may be something -- but love in general, respect --they are willing to accord us, that will be strictly defined by our position in the social hierarchy.

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这就是为什么我们如此在乎事业和成就,以及看重金钱和物质的原因。我们时常被告知我们处在一个物质挂帅的时代,我们都是贪婪的人。我并不认为我们特别看重物质,而是活在一个物质能带来大量情感反馈的时代。

And that's a lot of the reason why we care so much about our careers and indeed start caring so much about material goods. You know, we're often told that we live in very materialistic times, that we're all greedy people. I don't think we are particularly materialistic. I think we live in a society which has simply pegged certain emotional rewards to the acquisition of material goods. It's not the material goods we want;

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我们想要的不是物质,而是背后的情感反馈,这赋予奢侈品一个崭新的意义。下次你看到那些开着法拉利跑车的人,你不要想“这个人很贪婪”,而是“这是一个无比脆弱、急需爱的人”,也就是说,同情他们,不要鄙视他们。

It's the rewards we want. It's a new way of looking at luxury goods. The next time you see somebody driving a Ferrari, don't think, "This is somebody who's greedy." Think, "This is somebody who is incredibly vulnerable and in need of love." Feel sympathy, rather than contempt.

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还有一些其他的理由,使得我们更难获得平静。这有些矛盾,因为拥有自己的事业,是一件不错的事,但同时,人们也从未对自己的短暂一生有过这么高的期待。

There are other reasons --There are other reasons why it's perhaps harder now to feel calm than ever before. One of these, and it's paradoxical, because it's linked to something that's rather nice, is the hope we all have for our careers. Never before have expectations been so high about what human beings can achieve with their life span.

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这个世界用许多方法告诉我们,我们无所不能,我们不再受限于阶级,而是只要靠着努力就能攀上我们想到的高度。这是个美丽的理想,出于一种生而平等的精神,我们基本上是平等的,没有任何明显的阶级存在。这造成了一个严重的问题,这个问题是嫉妒。

We're told, from many sources, that any onecan achieve anything. We've done away with the caste system, we are now in a system where anyone can rise to any position they please. And it's a beautiful idea. Along with that is a kind of spirit of equality; we're all basically equal. There are no strictly defined hierarchies. There is one really big problem with this, and that problem is envy.

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嫉妒在今日是一种禁忌话题,但这个社会上最普遍的感受,便是嫉妒。嫉妒来自生而平等的精神。

Envy, it's a real taboo to mention envy, but if there's one dominant emotion in modern society, that is envy. And it's linked to the spirit of equality.

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这么说吧,我想在场的各位,或是观看这个影片的众位,很少有人会嫉妒英国女皇。虽然她比我们都更加富有,住在一个巨大的房子里,我们不会嫉妒她的原因是她太怪异了。

Let me explain. I think it would be very unusual for anyone here, or anyone watching, to be envious of the Queen of England. Even though she is much richer than any of you are, and she's got a very large house, the reason why we don't envy her is because she's too weird.

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她太怪了,我们无法想象自己与她扯上关系,她的语调令人发噱,来自一个奇怪的地方,我们与她毫无关联。当你认为你与这个人毫无关联时,你便不会嫉妒。越是两个年龄、背景相近的人,越容易陷入嫉妒的苦海,所以千万避免去参加同学会。因为没有比同学,更强烈的参照点了。

She's simply too strange. We can't relate to her, she speaks in a funny way, she comes from an odd place. So we can't relate to her, and when you can't relate to somebody, you don't envy them. The closer two people are -- in age, in background, in the process of identification -- the more there's a danger of envy, which is incidentally why none of you should ever go to a school reunion, because there is no stronger reference point than people one was at school with.

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今日社会的问题是,它把全世界变成了一个学校,每个人都穿着牛仔裤,每个人都一样。但并非如此,当生而平等的概念遇上现实中悬殊的不平等,巨大的压力就出现了。

The problem of modern society is it turns the whole world into a school. Everybody's wearing jeans, everybody's the same. And yet, they're not. So there's a spirit of equality combined with deep inequality, which can make for a very stressful situation.

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今日你变得像比尔-盖茨一样,有钱又出名的机会,大概就跟你在十七世纪,成为法国贵族一样困难。但重点是,感觉却差别很大。今日的杂志和其它媒体让我们感觉,只要你有冲劲、对科技有一些新颖的想法,再加上一个车库,你就可以踏上比尔的道路。

It's probably as unlikely that you would nowadays become as rich and famous as Bill Gates, as it was unlikely in the17th century that you would accede to the ranks of the French aristocracy. But the point is, it doesn't feel that way. It's made to feel, by magazines and other media outlets, that if you've got energy, a few bright ideas about technology, a garage -- you, too, could start a major thing.

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我们可以从书店中感受到这些问题所造成的后果,当你像我一样到大型书店里的,自我帮助书籍类。如果你分析现在出版的这些自我帮助类书籍,它们基本上分成两种,第一种告诉你“你做得到!你能成功!没有不可能!”另外一种则教导你如何处理,我们婉转地称呼为“缺乏自信”,或是直接了当地称为“自我感觉极差”。

The consequences of this problem make themselves felt in bookshops. When you go to a large bookshop and look at the self-help sections, as I sometimes do -- if you analyze self-help book sproduced in the world today, there are basically two kinds. The first kind tells you, "You can do it! You can make it! Anything's possible!" The other kind tells you how to cope with what we politely call "low self-esteem," or impolitely call, "feeling very bad about yourself."

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这两者中间有着绝对的关联,一个告诉人们他们无所不能的社会,和缺乏自信有着绝对的关联。另一件好事也会带来坏影响的例子,还有一些其它原因造成我们对事业,对我们在世上的地位感到前所未有的焦虑,再一次地,它也和好的概念有关,这个好概念叫做“功绩主义”。

There's a real correlation between a society that tells people that they can do anything, and the existence of low self-esteem. So that's another way in which something quite positive can have a nasty kickback. There is another reason why we might be feeling more anxious --about our careers, about our status in the world today, than ever before. And it's, again, linked to something nice. And that nice thing is called meritocracy.

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现在,无论是左倾还是右倾的政治人物,都同意“功绩主义”是个好事。我们应该尽力让我们的社会崇尚“功绩主义”,换句话说,一个崇尚“功绩主义”的社会是什么样的呢?一个崇尚功绩主义的社会相信,如果你有才能、精力和技术,你就会飞黄腾达,没有什么能阻止你,这是个美好的想法。

Everybody, all politicians on Left and Right, agree that meritocracy is a great thing, and we should all be trying to make our societies really, really meritocratic. In other words -- what is a meritocratic society? A meritocratic society is one in which, if you've got talent and energy and skill, you will get to the top, nothing should hold you back. It's a beautiful idea.

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问题是,如果你打从心里相信,那些在社会顶层的人都是精英,同时你也暗示着,以一种残忍的方法,相信那些在社会底层的人,天生就该在社会底层,换句话说,你在社会的地位不是偶然,而都是你配得的,这种想法让失败变得更残忍。

The problem is, if you really believe in a society where those who merit to get to the top, get to the top, you'll also, by implication, and in a far more nasty way, believe in a society where those who deserve to get to the bottom also get to the bottom and stay there. I nother words, your position in life comes to seem not accidental, but merited and deserved. And that makes failure seem much more crushing.

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